“I think your spiritual stripper name is Katharsis.” I about snorted my seltzer water out through my nose. My spiritual director was a hoot, we always found something inappropriately hilarious in serious soul growing conversations.
But I should start with how this whole conversation happened and that would be my cat Schumann peeing on a box full of tax and legal documents, one being my divorce paperwork. That cat was about to loose all indoor house cat privileges forever, but I must admit…he did me a huge favor. It was time to let 35 years of my life go, as in wipe it out. Clean house of everything tied to the past..This box was full of 35 years of things I held on to because, well…I was supposed to right? You’re supposed to hold on to your past.
Screw that! Frankly, my past was full of a lot of bad decisions from men to finances. I held on to guilt, shame, feelings of unworthiness, doing things for the sake of everyone else, or simply trying to hold up a false ego self. I let people treat me like shit and I treated people like shit.
“I’m stripping it all away, I’m letting this shit go! And I’m telling the truth to people, there’s no reason to not to. Want to hang in my old soul circles, your going to have to walk the line of truth and true being, and that is definitely NOT for everyone. Trust me…three years ago, I wouldn’t have hung out with me as I am now. Too scary, because I’d see through my own bullshit. Who wants to hang out with people who are able to see you through the lies you tell even yourself. Ironically, it’s a hell of a lot easier to operate from truth.
It’s kinda like letting go of all these “important documents” that I thought I needed to save over the years. Like a false sense of self I needed to portray to make it seem like “I had it all together.” No one has it all together. These documents I was holding on to, because, that’s what you are supposed to do. I never look at them. If I need something, like a tax document. That’s always on file somewhere in cyberspace.
I’m stripping things down, getting naked, and going to see what’s there . Just me, I guess, my weird self, and now a bunch of empty space in my house…for something…well…I don’t know, but I feel it’s going to be grand.” I don’t need these past things anymore, I don’t need anything or anyone to like me, I have everything I need…here…naked. I like sleeping naked, so why not be spiritually naked?”
“Good for you, spiritual stripper.” We both started laughing